Teen Dating Violence

 Myths:

1. They are just " Kids in Love," doing the "Teen Dating Thing," there is nothing dangerous going on.
2. He will change when we get married.
3. Battering is rare.
4. When you fall in love, nothing else matters.
5. Dating someone is better than dating no one.
6. Violence only happens to the poor, poorly educated or to minorities.
7. Love means never having to say you are sorry.
8. Love and violence cannot exist together in a relationship.
9. Once a victim of domestic violence, always a victim.
10. Stress, drugs or alcohol cause the violence.
11. Battering is about mutual fighting; "it takes two to tango."
12. Domestic and dating violence is usually a one-time event, an isolated incident.

Facts:

1. Dating violence has nothing to do with love. It is the same as domestic violence, and it is about power and control.
2. Abusers are often very good at disguising jealousy as love. Jealousy is a controlling behavior.
3. Battering is extremely common. A woman is battered every nine seconds in the United States.
4. When you fall in love you should not have to end everything else in your life. Giving any one person all of your time, energy and attention puts them in a powerful position.
5. You don't have to date someone to be someone.
6. Battering happens to rich, white, educated and respectable people. Violence in a relationship can happen to anyone.
7. The ability to apologize, to admit fault and to recognize mistakes constitutes one of the greatest traits in a solid partnership. Being in love means you are committed to saying, "I'm sorry."
8. The relationship between an abuser and a victim can be confusing. Many batterers act in love, caring ways some of the time. Victims may love the batterer and want the battering to stop. Over time, however, the loving periods may lessen or change.
9. It is possible to move beyond the status of being a victim. Positive interventions can help victims rebuild a sense of self.
10. Stress, drugs, and alcohol may contribute to an episode of domestic or dating violence, but they are not the cause. Abusive behavior is a learned behavior and it is a choice.
11. In domestic and dating assaults, one partner is beating, intimidating, and terrorizing the other.
12. Battering is a pattern of behavior. Once the violence begins in a relationship, it only escalates without intervention.